Making Feminism Sexy with Jennifer Keishin Armstrong

          Women’s issues are hotly debated, often controversial, and…sexy? “Feminism is sexy in a really general way,” says Jennifer Keishin Armstrong. “It can make your life fun, it can make your life better. The ultimate goal is to be free to be yourself.” As the co-founder of SexyFeminist.com, co-author of Sexy Feminism, and free-lance journalist, Armstrong has immersed herself in the political and cultural world of feminism. She tackles everything from women’s reproductive rights to Tina Fey. “It’s nice to be able to go between Beyonce and lip gloss and Hillary Clinton,” Armstrong says. If there’s anything you ever wanted to know about the political sphere of feminism, Armstrong’s probably written about it, telling the straightforward facts with a “sexy” twist.

          But Armstrong didn’t always consider herself a feminist. While attending Northwestern University, Armstrong says she took women’s literature courses and dabbled in feminist tendencies just like most female college students. But upon graduation, though still taken with feminist topics, she soon found she had to write about whatever topics would pay the bills. “You get excited about it and then life happens,” Armstrong says. After school, Armstrong became a reporter in Southern California for a few years before returning back to Chicago. But after some time there, she knew she wanted to move onto bigger and better things. “I had always wanted to come to New York to pursue a bigger magazine-type career,” she says. And that’s exactly what she got.

The (Appropriate) Way to Be Obsessed

            I’m about to tell you something I’m sure you already know, if you know me at all or if you just happened to peruse my blog once or twice: I like French bulldogs. I know, shocker right? Most people would even say I was obsessed. And they would probably be right. But I feel I need to say something to justify myself: there’s a right way to be obsessed, and an obnoxious way to be obsessed. Now, some haters may call me the obnoxious type, and that’s ok, you are entitled to your opinion, but there is an unofficial etiquette guide for such things that you’ll get here, exclusively.  People become obsessed with all sorts of things; animals, TV shows, celebrities, you name it. But there is a fine line between obsessed and insane, and for those of you who toe that line on a daily basis (yup, that’s me), here’s a guide to proper obsession:

Artwork is always classy

      Keep it classy

You may think it’s a totally great idea to get a tattoo of your favorite movie star on your back, but in ten years, even if you are still obsessed with him, that tat is going to be saggy just like that celeb. Tattoos are a little far. So is plastering your wall with pictures of him or owning five shirts in different colors with his face. Overkill. Incorporate your obsession in subtle ways, making it an artsy addition to your life. You can still be surrounded by what you love without being crazy.

A great Frenchie gift from a friend

      (Sneakily) Get your friends involved

Do you love looking at pictures of your obsession online in your downtime? Me too. I love those squishy little faces so much. Now, if you truly are obsessed, I’m sure your friends know. So if you can key them into your obsession, without seeming crazy, they’ll pitch in with some team searching. Every time my friends find a hidden gem of a picture or a story (recently Brooklyn Frenchie proposal story. Look it up) about French bulldogs, they immediately send it to me. It’s like having my own search time on constant alert for cuteness. Saves me a lot of time and effort…

Frenchie stationary

           Make your daily incorporation subtle

If people can discover your obsession with something within five minutes of meeting you, you’re not being subtle. If you’re obsessed with a TV show, put a picture of the cast as your background, or if you can’t get enough of sloths, get some cute stationary with them to send out as thank you cards. You don’t have to shove your obsession in people’s faces. Make them search for it.

Studying up to get a dog      

      Don’t just be obsessed, go get it

Are you obsessed with Sex and the City? Go on the New York Sex and the City Tour. Can’t get enough of Kate Spade shoes? Save up your money to buy a pair. Obviously this tip doesn’t work as well if your obsession is a person, because that’s creepy, but it works for most other things, including a French bulldog. That’s why after years of obsession, I’m finally getting one. That’s the next logical step, right?

          So go on, love what you love, and don’t be ashamed. Don’t be a crazy person and don’t make people hate you for constantly talking about what you love, but if it makes you happy, then by all means, bring it into your life.

The New Way to Watch Television

            I’m not really a big fan of watching shows on TV. Waiting a week in between each episode? I’ll forget why I was excited about the show in the first place. I, like so many young adults today, am a bigger fan of what has come to be called “binge viewing.” According to an article by Emma Montgomery on broadcastingcable.com, binge viewing is “perfectly suited to the on-demand, in the moment, entertainment-seeking lifestyle that millennials lead.” And it’s true. When I finish an episode of a show like Breaking Bad, I didn’t want to have to wait a week to see what happens. In fact, next week at that time, I might not have even had time. That’s why I waited until the show ended and watched it all at once.

            It seems that us millennials prefer this method of show viewing. According to a survey done by The Trending Machine, when asked how they would prefer to watch a 13-episode season of a show, 43% of responders ages 18-24 said they would want to watch it all in one day. 30% said they’d prefer to watch it over a few days. Only 10% of responders that age said they’d prefer to watch it over 13-weeks, the regular time frame for a 13-episode season. But responders who were 45-54 years old were the opposite. Only 24% would prefer to watch all in one day, and the majority, 33%, wanted to watch it over the 13-weeks.

            So why is it that millennials just can’t wait? Though I can’t speak for the rest of the world, I can say why I can’t: because I don’t have to. Cable companies and television producers are so interested in millennial habits and so quick to cater to the millennial consumer that they make nearly every show on television readily available online. In 2012, television was rated the top content preferred by millennials, over music and movies. So I don’t want to watch movie after movie on my Saturday off, nor do I want to watch just one episode of a show that I missed. I want to watch the whole show. Call me a greedy millennial, but I’ll never give up my day-long Netflix dates. Never.

Work-Wear Matters

            I usually consider leggings and a sweater a perfectly acceptable outfit. In fact, you’d have a good chance of finding me out on a Friday night in just that. Hey, no judgment, right? But not at work. I feel like work is another dimension of higher expectations, where you never know who you’re going to meet or where you’ll end up by the end of the day. Sure, you could say the same thing about going out with friends on the weekend, but if I meet someone special then, they’ll have to see me in my casual glory sooner or later, right? Work companions won’t.

            But at my new job, I was shocked by the low-key dress code in the office; jeans, Ugg boots, the works. If that’s your thing, good for you. But I just couldn’t. Sure, maybe I looked a little ridiculous crouching by the mail cabinet rummaging for a magazine in my skirt and heels, but I’m dressing for the job I want, not the job I have. Is it crazy to want to dress up, even if that makes you the odd one out?

            Science says no. In a recent study by Psychology Today, 300 participants were exposed to two men, one dressed in an expensive, tailored suit, the other in a similar, but lower-quality suit. After a 3-second exposure to the men from the neck down, participants spoke overwhelmingly more favorable about the man in the nicer outfit. They thought him more confident, successful, and guessed that he made more money. All because of his outfit. Clothing, whether we like it our not, has become an indication of our economic and social standing.

            But more than that, clothes not only dictate how others view us, but can also change how we view ourselves. Northwestern University did a study on something called “enclothed cognition,” meaning how what one wears alters their behavior. In the study, they gave each participant a white lab coat. To some, they said it was a doctor’s coat. To others, it was a painter’s smock. Turns out the people who thought they were wearing a doctor’s coat acted more careful and attentive than those who thought they had a painter’s smock. In an article for Forbes.com, Dr. Jennifer Baumgartner said, “When you dress in a certain way, it helps shift your internal self.” Just look at makeovers or actors wearing costumes, she says. What you wear can change you internally.

            So when it comes to work, I’ll keep trudging through the snow in my heeled boots and skirt because, you know what? It’s worth it. Maybe it won’t actually make me more professional or cause me to work harder, but you never know. Maybe it will.  

When I Realize I'm Almost, like, an Adult

To remind me of my youth...
(yup, that's me)

Ever done something and then thought to yourself, “Oh my God, I’m old.” I have. All the time. Sometimes I worry I’m actually a middle-aged woman caught in the body of a 20-year-old. My days of childish care-free worry are over and true adulthood is looming on the horizon. My adult ah-ha moments keep jumping out at me. Here are times I realized adulthood is closer than I thought:

When friends ask me to meet them at 10pm, I laugh. Sorry, man. I’m not leaving my house after the sun goes down. Preferably, I’d also like to return to my house before said sun goes down too, but that’s a bit more flexible.

I get to use the phrase “at work today…” and not be referring to retail or babysitting. Now I finally have something more interesting to say than, “At work today, the youngest one colored me a picture.”

Facebook annoys me. OMG I’m SO glad that you and your boyfriend of two weeks are so MADLY in love and you want to post Pic Stiches about it ALL THE TIME and talk about how AMAZING he is (even though last weekend you were telling me he gets too drunk and never actually calls you back). PLEASE post more horribly romantic pictures so I can feel terrible about my life and hate you THAT much more.

I no longer consider Thursday the weekend. Not long ago I used to fall into the category of the unemployed college student that had no responsibilities Friday morning except making waffles. And it was grand. But when you have to be out the door by 8:30 on that Friday morning, Thursday becomes another early bedtime for me.  

Even the idea of a club makes me claustrophobic. Sweaty, half-clothed people trying to grind up on me and make conversation even though we both know we can’t hear a thing in there? Yeah, no thanks.

I’ve actually used the phrase “when I was a kid…” more than once. But let’s be real, kids of the 90’s had N’Sync, the Bop-It, and bubble gum in the shape of Band-Aids. How could you not want to talk about it all the time?

5 Things I'd Rather Do Than Go Outside

Credit: www.acuteday.com

I don’t really do cold. My father used to laugh at me when I told him I wanted to get away from frigid Colorado by moving to New York City. Guess what? It’s just as cold AND I actually have to leave my warm house and walk everywhere. Maybe you’re a fan of Jack Frost, love heading out to the ski slopes or just bundling up in your cute sweater. Good for you. But that’s not me. So when the weekend weather drives me back under my covers and makes me about as excited to go outside as I would be to chew off my own arm, I’ve got to get creative with my time.

      1.    Hulu Catch-up Marathon: Let’s face it; when you have a life, you don’t get to stay up to date on your favorite TV shows. Take the morning while you try to convince yourself that clothes other than your pajamas might be worth a try to catch up on all the shows you’ve missed.

      2.    Actually organize your stuff: I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not always as clean as I’d like to be. I think the floor is a perfectly good storage location. But while you’re inside all day, tackle a “problem area” in your home and get crafty. Use an old glass to hold your toothbrush and toothpaste, a magazine holder for your blow-dryer and hairbrush; whatever you need to do to put things in a place you’ll actually find them later.

      3.    Cook for the week: If you’ve got a lifestyle that permits you to spend an hour every night making some sort of gourmet meal even Pinterest would envy, I’m jealous of you. But most of us don’t. And if you’re like me, when you come home from a long day of class or work, the last thing you want to do is slave away in front of the stove for an hour. You want food. Now. So cook some chili you can freeze in Tupperware or bake chicken that you can cut into strips for sandwiches. When you’ve got extra time, make the meals you wish you had time to during the week.

      4.    Start a project: Maybe you’re a “vision boarder” or a scrap-booker. Me? I’m a knitter. Chances are good that you haven’t had a day to work on any of that recently (I’ve been knitting the same blanket since freshman year). Just sit down and do it. Pick a project for the day and do something that makes you happy (bonus points if you can do it AND have your Hulu Catch-up Marathon).

      5.    Don’t do anything: If going outside requires the same gear as adventuring in the Arctic tundra, I’d literally rather do absolutely nothing than hike through the snow. But let’s be honest; how many days do you have to sit around and just do nothing? Not many. And as a student about to enter the workforce, these days will soon be few and far between for me. When you have a day where nothing calls you out of the house, relish in it.