Since when did online dating in college become a thing? I guess I missed the boat. After hearing about it incessantly from friends, from acquaintances, and in online posts, I decided to do some investigating of my own. I dug deeper for an article in my journalism class. It was funny, I thought, a thing my friends did as kind of a joke, something silly they did in their spare time. Tinder, OkCupid, DateMySchool; I’d heard of people that had tried them, but usually as somewhat of a social experiment, just to see what would happen. But it turns out the joke was on me. My friends were actually using social media sites in place of more “traditional” tactics of finding dates. As I searched for sources to write about, people seemed to come out of the woodwork. Some of my friends had been on several successful dates through apps you could download on your phone, others had even found a significant other. They were shocked I hadn’t done the same. Was I missing something?
According
to a 2006 study by the Pew Internet ad American Life Project, one in ten
Internet users have tried online dating. And that was in 2006. The Internet and
reach of online dating has exploded since then. In the past few years, dating
sites specifically designed for college-aged students have popped up all over
the place. These sites, which are easily accessible through the app store and
can connect to your various social media platforms, attract a younger audience
than E-Harmony or Match.com, where most users are over the age of 30.
DateMySchool even claims that it has been responsible for 50% of dates at NYU
alone.
So
am I the wrong? Call me old-fashioned, but I’ve always searched for dates
through friends-of-friends, maybe someone I met at a school club or on a Friday
night out. But online dating? I’d always thought it was for the washed up, for
those who couldn’t find dates on their own. But suddenly, I’m in the minority.
But
the traditional tactic has always worked for someone like me. I’m a hater of
awkward silences. Getting to know someone is usually something I avoid; I
prefer to spend time learning more about people I already know. So what could
sites like these do for me? Send me on a handful of dates every month, one of
which might actually go somewhere? No thanks. Sure, it took two years of wading
through seemingly straight gay men at NYU to find a few datable keepers, but I
did it. It seems to me that traditional dating, despite what my friends might
think, is still alive and well. So maybe I’m not “trendy” when it comes to
dating, but I’m doing alright.
Perhaps
it’s a matter of deciding which dater you are. Are you a serial dater, one who
would go to a hundred dinners just to enjoy one? Then Tinder’s the place for
you. Maybe you’re introverted, busy, spend a lot of time with the same people,
but you don’t want to go on dates by the handful. Perhaps a site like OkCupid
or DateMySchool, echoing a traditional pairing based on mutual interests and
likes, is the place to be. Or maybe you’re like me. You’d rather wait around
and enjoy the single life until someone comes to you, preferring to leave the
hard work of courting up to someone else. Then, be prepared to wait a while,
but stick to your guns. I did.
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